Spring Photo Shoot

After I gutted the fence area I talked Holt into doing a photo shoot.

I Do Think About You

Today's his birthday. His first. It has been exactly one year since I sat in the hallway at Timothy and knew there was something wrong before daddy reached me. It has been a year that I have had to keep the worst secret from Holt and Caro. It has been one year since I sat in my room and cried on Oliver Jones. It has been many times that in my grief at sleepovers, I have crawled into my best friend's closets and cried because we were watching heartbreaking movies about babies. It's been a year.
As I was sitting in the car today a country song came on the radio and the chorus caught my attention. This song was talking about a man that had had a car accident and killed his wife (I am assuming) in the process. The chorus was:

Don't think I don't think about it,

Don't think I don't have regrets

I had to fight to not lose it in the Chick-fil-a parking lot. I was looking for my diary today and I came across my entry from March 5th last year:

Hi. It is the 5th of March and mama lost the baby yesterday. They are coming home from the hospital today. Gramma and Big are here. So now Anna Kay, John Crawford, and Josiah Birch (Whose nickname I gave him is Teddy after Theodore in Little Women because he was like a brother to them.) are all in Heaven. Kales and Ems didn't even know about the baby but I told them everything yesterday. I have closed the doors to my room and my music is on.
Bye,
Juliana
This is worse than Crawford's birthday because I didn't really want a little brother when we found out mama was pregnant so I didn't get as attached to him as I did Teddy. I thought about all the time what fun things we would do together when he got bigger. I thought about everything, but most of all I thought about loving him. And as weird as this sounds I have found that I think, because he is not here with me I love him more than I ever could have, had he not died. Teddy, I DO think about it and I love you with all my heart.

Just now Carolina was outside and she had gathered some dirt( wierd thing to collect, huh?) So she went over to the grass and bent down and said " Eat up, eat up! There!" It was really funny. Just thought I would share that.

Last night Carolina asked if she could sleep with me. I told her that there were some rules if she wanted to sleep in there. She must not get up (in the past she tends to wake me up at midnight when the fun is over and tell me she wants to sleep with mama) unless she had to go the bathroom or was bleeding. She was also not allowed to talk (in the past Holt and Carolina have had shouting contests). So, naturally she then said, "But, can I breathe, though?"

What kind of a person am I?

Upgrade From Last Year's Movies

If you will recall on my blog like probably 50 posts ago I did a bunch of movies with my cousins. Well, I got to see them last night and I haven't seen them in over a year. So, after dinner Mason and I went downstairs to do "interviews". Here is the list: Shawn White (snowboarder), me, Carolina, Random Person, Randy Jackson and Chewbacca. Please note that, yes, I did almost die in the Randy Jackson one.

Such A Cute Age...

Today at the grocery store Miss Mouse wanted to hold my hand instead of playing her DS. She also remarked on the baking aisle," It smells like marshmellows in here!" I love her.

** Note: The above picture was taken after we arrived home from the bowling alley and mouse still was not done with her bigger than her face sprite.**

Waitin' for De Mama

Just a trip out to the back garage but then again she may never come back.

Georgia Wonderland

I am so sorry that I have not blogged in over a month but I just haven't had anything to blog about. I finally have something to blog about, though. It snowed! Now, just to clarify, yes I did get stupidly exited about the three inches we got and I don't really know why since we used to live in Kentucky and it snowed UP TO MY WAIST THERE. But anyway it snowed and I had the pleasure of taking the dog out that really cold Friday morning. Just to let all you folks out there know (I don't really know who would want to know but I am going to tell you anyway) Walter was really puzzled by the snow. And by Saturday morning when I took him out we had the full three inches and so he took it upon himself to bury himself in it. Also, he got snow between his eyes. I mean how does that happen? He must be supernatural dog to get snow between his eyeballs. I went sledding with mama on Satrurday and Walter found much joy in chasing us down our hill. Also, that morning I went looking for the sleds in my pj's just so I knew where they were soI could go in and change. Well, I found them. Flat on my back. I slipped on them. Yeah. I think I might be the clumsiest human being in the earth. The pictures above I took on Saturday.

Okay. Well. Where do I start? A. I have a virus. B. mama has strep. C. Carolina has pink eye. and D. daddy has a virus. Holt and the dog? Well, they are doing just fine. Okay who else here thinks that it is so wrong that once in the three years that we have lived here it is supposed to snow when only one kid is well enough to go out and play in it? And furthermore that kid is not me! So. Yeah. Bye

New Year's Photo Shoot

2009 brought a lot of laughing, a little crying but more importantly it brought: Holt sneezing very loudly,the nativity, ol' kentuck, my little indian, conehead walta, ems acting like an idiot with a bottle of water for more than one occasion, football (both on the screen and off), Christmas In Comfort, Desperoux, music videos, hot sauce in eyeballs, chicken dances, river wading, uno losers, walta ,tball,lots of swimming with my bffs, and a little bit of kung foo fighting. Happy new year!